I don't want to miss the moments.......

A sweet mama to 6 beautiful kids has reminded me to step back away from everything that makes me fog....for me the term fog means I just go through motions like a robot, mostly a robot with panic disorder, anxiety, anger, jealousy, self pity and all the other roots of evil that haunt me..then the day is gone. I don't know where it went, what I did that impacted my children, my friends, my family, the World. God gave me 6 incredible people to watch over for Him........imagine that, for one second. GOD, the alpha and omega, the giver and the taker of all things...GOD himself. And I get one chance, one short life time, one time of babies, one season of toddlers, one stage of adolecents and one shot at teenagers...that is it, never to have again. When the day is gone, the opportunity is over, lost forever.
I chose the song Who am I to start playing on this blog because it humbles me to remember......who am I? That God would chose me? And what am I to my God if I don't cherish every single moment He gives me?
Pam, thank you............from the very bottom of my heart for making me see what I knew, but so easily forget. And why? Why forget? When that ALONE is where the JOY is???? Is there something in misery that is attractive that one would yearn for it?

The JOY is Christ. The JOY is knowing fully how blessed I am to have been given this life with my beautiful children, the JOY in knowing I can be a part of planting the seed of salvation within each of them, and the JOY of seeing, watching, learning and experiencing each day of life with them........and not missing it.

You can see the button on the right of my blog page here that says, "You're gonna miss this". That is Pam's page and I am linking in my post..........of something that happened with my kids that I didn't want to miss.

I went to dinner with my mother for the first time in years alone last night. As a matter of fact, we hadn't spent any time alone in many years. Quick visits, kids noise, busy schedules, but lately I just wanted my mama......I didn't want to say that to her though. She lost her mother when she was 16. She has probably spent seas of tears crying because she has wanted her mama over the years. So I asked her to spend some time with me alone....she was excited, so was I. We got in the car and the first thing I said was, lets make a vow to each other now, that we won't bitch about anything tonight. Tonight, we will talk about old memories, hopes for the future, what we love and hope to laugh. I know I needed that, and I think she did too.........and that is just what we did. We ate at Carrabba's. We shared thoughts, but mostly joked and hung out like friends. We shared some wine and stuffed ourselves like pigs! I felt like a part of my heart was healed from it...........why did it take so long? Why didn't I ask her sooner? Why didn't I make the time?
Doesn't matter now....now when I want my mama, Im gonna tell her.

One thing we talked about were my boys. Richard is 15, Jarrod 13. I have to say that I love this stage. They are the closest people to me right now I think. I wasn't easy on them when they were little..........everyone always said I was strict or whatever. I don't think it was that so much as it was Biblical. God commands children to obey their parents, and I cherished them to pieces, but they were my children and they were treated as such. I taught them to obey and they did......and it was the best thing I ever did because now that they are accountable mostly to God in this transition stage, we can be friends....and I just love being able to be friends with my teenage boys. They are soooooo much fun, I can feel how much they love me and I know they feel my love for them. they are soooooo awesome with the babies, which just melts my heart, and they truly hurt if I am ill or jump right in to help when they are needed. And "most" of the time I get a "yes mam, I would be happy to". They are funny, smart and gosh darn it good looking! (I know I am a bit bias, but you have to admit they are cute!!)
How blessed am I?

The boys and Presleigh



























Richard with cousin Grace













Jarrod and Santa at the Children's Choice Christmas Party












Jarrod with little sister Bronwyn and my mom (MiMi)




My mom with Zoe :)